On Waiting

"I thought I had already worked it out, you know
I've confronted the whole idea of
Him
And I've figured it all out
I did all that inner child work
And I'm free to choose my own path now
But I still cannot find it in me
To forgive him"

(And maybe forgive myself)

"Well, maybe that child is still waiting
Waiting
For his daddy to come home."


(And that broke me
Broke me again and shattered me into a million shards.)

On Living Every Day

Wake up
Pray and mandi
Call Grab
Have breakfast and coffee
Write my reflections

Take the train to the office
Work
Check Instagram
Work 
Pray
Work
Eat lunch (sometimes)
Work some more
Pray
Pack up

Take the train home
Close my Move loop in the mall
Eat dinner (sometimes)
Pray
Read (or watch Netflix)
Mandi and pray
Turn off the lights and close my eyes and think about Jah and Life and where am I going and what does it all mean and am I doing this right and how am I going to get through tomorrow and. 

Inspired by Ted Berrigan's 10 things I do every day

On Letting Go and Letting God

Let go and let God have His way with you
Trust in His magnum Grace and guidance true.
Days like these it feels like Life ain't playing
Fair, and cheers have turned to jeers and braying.
But know that your Lord cares for you and loves
You, and in your hardship, know that His troves
of treasure wait whom hold onto His rope
Steadfast, never falt'ring in Faith and Hope
For his benediction. Just do your thing:
The redemption you prayed for, He will bring. 

Inspired by PJ Morton's "Let Go (feat. The Walls Group)" from his The Piano Album

On The Call of the Machine

Most days, you will hear it as a whispered breeze
Passing through the tall trees of your daily existence
Seducing you with its gentle caress
And sometimes, on days like today
The song becomes a deafening roar in your ear
Pulling at your hand
Tugging at your heart
Screaming in your face:
Surrender to the machine!
Submit to the call!
Obey obey obey!

On Staying Calm

Calm down. Relax.
No one is looking. 
Everyone else is busy
Fretting over their own lives,
Their own dreams and conceits and vanities
To notice what you just said,
Or the existential angst
That burns like midnight fire
Through each line
Of that LinkedIn post that you just wrote. 

On The Fish Pond

Like little flickering flames
Dancing within the depths of a mirror
The little red fishies evade the
Staccato swishes
Of my tender ten-year old fingers
Roiling the surface of the fish pond
Like the clumsy clowning of an errant god.

On The Idiot Box

There I was, sunk into myself, eyes glazed
As a parade of beguiling sights and
Sounds charm me like a beady-eyed serpent
Needy, greedy in my des’prate desire
To forget, to beget my own slumber
Against the roaring din of existence.

On The Miracle of Modern Flight

Beyond mere sight, the drone of jet-heeled thrust
Propels these numbered souls through sky, through clouds
Aboard this metal wing we embarked, flocked
And flecked with hopes and honeyed dreams ablaze.
Hurtling through the smoky night, we sail thus
Within tubular confine, nonchalant
At the miracle of modern flight, such
Being this, our present state of blessed grace.
Lives thus emplaced in Techne’s steady hand,
We embrace the calm slumber of meek souls.

On New Adventures

Always, the best things in our lives, they come 
Unbidden, unasked, unexpectedly.
What does it take for the pale slivers of
Random good fortune and fate to greet us
And beckon us with grace and welcome smile?
How is it that such blessings often bid
Welcome only once Time has done its work,
When Aeschylus’ awful grace has worn down
Grieving hearts into spartan fists, never
Falt’ring in their austere, singular task
Of mournful remembrance for what once was?
And yet, and yet - Fortuna will demand
That we wipe our tears and hoist sails anew:
Fresh winds now come to stir this placid sea
A new adventure calls - we sail today.