I have come so far
And it is only forty years later
That I can now feel
The inexorable
inviolable
inescapable pull of gravity
Anchoring me here
In amiable exile
I have everything I need
Here
Except for the buried treasure
Of finally seeing myself
And loving myself
With fullest acceptance.
On That Deep, Dark Void
Don’t ask me to look into
That deep, dark void
I just cannot imagine
This life without
You.
On Mutual Vanity
Look at us! Look at us!
So accomplished, so prestigious!
Is that you,
In that magazine?
Well it’s me,
On the cover of the magazine!
Look at us!
I mean,
Look at me!
On Trying Not to Drown
On the phone with you, minutes to midnight
We talked of scandal and cats and The Crown
And I could not find words to be forthright
With you: how I’m trying each day not to drown.
On Waiting
"I thought I had already worked it out, you know
I've confronted the whole idea of
Him
And I've figured it all out
I did all that inner child work
And I'm free to choose my own path now
But I still cannot find it in me
To forgive him"
(And maybe forgive myself)
"Well, maybe that child is still waiting
Waiting
For his daddy to come home."
(And that broke me
Broke me again and shattered me into a million shards.)
On Living Every Day
Wake up Pray and mandi Call Grab Have breakfast and coffee Write my reflections Take the train to the office Work Check Instagram Work Pray Work Eat lunch (sometimes) Work some more Pray Pack up Take the train home Close my Move loop in the mall Eat dinner (sometimes) Pray Read (or watch Netflix) Mandi and pray Turn off the lights and close my eyes and think about Jah and Life and where am I going and what does it all mean and am I doing this right and how am I going to get through tomorrow and. Inspired by Ted Berrigan's 10 things I do every day
On Letting Go and Letting God
Let go and let God have His way with you Trust in His magnum Grace and guidance true. Days like these it feels like Life ain't playing Fair, and cheers have turned to jeers and braying. But know that your Lord cares for you and loves You, and in your hardship, know that His troves of treasure wait whom hold onto His rope Steadfast, never falt'ring in Faith and Hope For his benediction. Just do your thing: The redemption you prayed for, He will bring. Inspired by PJ Morton's "Let Go (feat. The Walls Group)" from his The Piano Album
On The Call of the Machine
Most days, you will hear it as a whispered breeze
Passing through the tall trees of your daily existence
Seducing you with its gentle caress
And sometimes, on days like today
The song becomes a deafening roar in your ear
Pulling at your hand
Tugging at your heart
Screaming in your face:
Surrender to the machine!
Submit to the call!
Obey obey obey!
On Staying Calm
Calm down. Relax. No one is looking. Everyone else is busy Fretting over their own lives, Their own dreams and conceits and vanities To notice what you just said, Or the existential angst That burns like midnight fire Through each line Of that LinkedIn post that you just wrote.
On The Fish Pond
Like little flickering flames
Dancing within the depths of a mirror
The little red fishies evade the
Staccato swishes
Of my tender ten-year old fingers
Roiling the surface of the fish pond
Like the clumsy clowning of an errant god.